Difficult Parenting Topic #1 - Funerals and Death

I debated discussing this topic as it is quite sensitive and everyone probably has differing opinions, but I think it's important when you have to make decisions you weren't really prepared for - like I was.

My uncle passed away a few weeks ago, it was unexpected and sudden.  I hadn't seen him for about 10 years, but I had spoken to his children, my cousins, on and off since we found each other on facebook a few years ago.  I spent a lot of time with them as a child, but as we grew up, we drifted.

Having lost my step dad, nearly 5 years ago, in the same sudden circumstance, I knew their pain and anguish and felt compelled to attend the funeral to support them.

The conflict arose when I was discussing with my fiance about taking our children.  O is 3 and a half and baby N is 4 months old.  My fiance was ok with me wanting to take baby N, but I wanted to take O too.  I figured it would be a long time before my family got to see them again - they live some distance from us. 

My fiance was concerned that our sensitive 3 yr old would be upset and confused about the funeral as we hadn't discussed death with him yet. He also thought O was too young to know about it all, and to see me upset.  As much as I agreed with him, I also had a different perspective.

My thoughts were that the next time O would attend a funeral, it would be for someone that he knew and loved and that he would be devastated by losing them.  I thought that attending my uncles funeral, a man he'd never met, would be less distressing and a much gentler way to introduce him to death and funerals.

After a lengthy discussion, my fiance reluctantly agreed to bring both boys with us.

The morning of the funeral, we told O where we were going and what was happening.  We explained things simply and answered his questions honestly. We explained to him that sometimes our bodies stop working and when that happens, we can't talk, eat or breathe anymore and we lay still like sleeping, but we don't wake up. We explained that there would be a coffin and lots of sad people. He had a lot of questions about the coffin and we explained it was a big comfy bed. 

Both boys did remarkably well at the service.  We decided not to attend the burial as we thought it might be a bit too much for O to understand. I plan to take him to a cemetery when he is a bit older, so when the time comes to attend a burial for a loved one, it wont be so scary.

How would you deal with a situation like this? Would you take your young children to a funeral?  How would you explain death to them?

Ash x

Healthy Eating: Wrap Style

So, I've been trying to eat a lot healthier lately - lose that baby weight and get comfortable in my skin!  So here is a quick, easy, healthy and DELICIOUS wrap that I have been making a lot lately!

What you'll need:

Whole meal/whole grain wrap

Avocado

Cucumber

Spinach

Strawberries

Feta (I used Greek)

All you have to do is eyeball the amounts or use my picture as a reference.  Feel free to add/replace ingredients to suit your tastes!

Enjoy!


Ash x

It's Smoothie Season!

So now that smoothie season is here (bring on the skinny jeans!), I'm going to share my favourite smoothie recipe with you!

Smoothie #1 - Friday Favourite

What you'll need:

- Milk/water (milk is in the picture, but I used water instead and eyeballed the amount)

- Chia seeds (about a tablespoon)

- Flaxseed/linseed meal (about a tablespoon)

- yoghurt,plain or flavoured (I used peach)

- Goji berries (small handful)

- a banana (chopped roughly)

- a mandarin (I used half and broke into segments)

- spinach/kale (I used a handful of frozen spinach)

- mixed berries, fresh or frozen (I used about a handful of frozen)

Here it is in my giant cup thing that the stick mixer goes into.  Keep in mind that if you use a stick mixer, you will need to mix it gently as the blades can get stuck as its not very liquid in the beginning. If you try to squash it down and its still not really doing much, add some more milk or water and that'll solve the problem.  If you use a blender then you wont have any problems at all!

And here it is all ready to drink! all 650ml of it!! To save on washing up, i just drink it straight from the cup!

Enjoy!

ash x

I'm 'that mum'

When I was growing up, and still to this day, I have the mum that buys children books and educational toys for birthdays' and Christmas'.  It never really bothered me because I liked all that stuff and was an avid book reader, but some of the time the kids who received them didn't play with/read them, because they weren't 'cool' and that made me mad because my mum had little money and always gave gifts generously, with love and the hope that she was helping them to learn something new. And yes, my mum is now a primary school teacher!

I've always grown up thinking, I want to be 'that mum' that buys children books and crafts and not just another plastic toy.  Give them something they can carry with them as they get older, give them some tools that can help them learn the alphabet, simple math etc.  Especially those children that are in full-time day care where they don't get the one on one time that they need to learn and develop some of these things.  

My mum taught me this, and for that, I will be forever grateful.  Giving the gift of knowledge and education is priceless.

So now that I'm a mother and have my children and other children to buy for, I have begun my journey of trying to give something a little more meaningful to the kids I know and hope that they enjoy it.I'm proud to be 'that mum'.
ash x

Top 3 Healthy Eating Tips for Lazy People

For the last 3 weeks or so, I've been trying to eat a lot healthier.  I'm nearly 3 months postpartum and summer is on its way. And yes while I know I should be focusing on my boys, and I certainly am, I cant help but feel like I should at least try to get back to my pre-baby body body.  

But here's the catch. I'm a bit lazy and lack motivation sometimes. I also am a procrastinator and excuse maker - which I can guarantee are not good qualities to have when trying to create a better lifestyle. I had these grand plans to cut out carbs as much as possible and have a few 'cheat meals' a week, buy all this delicious fresh food and drink 'green' smoothies twice a day to replace breakfast and lunch.

It was going good for about a week, but then something happened. It got cold outside. Yep, I'm blaming the weather. I've somehow convinced myself that its too cold right now to make my smoothies (which included spinach and berries from the freezer), so when it gets warmer, I'll start again.

NO ASHLEIGH.

So because I lack strong willpower and determination and am a creature of comfort and comfort foods, I've come up with a few healthier things I can do until the warm weather comes back - hopefully soon!!

So, here's my Top 3 Healthy Eating Tips for Lazy People:

1. Chia seeds, flax seed, goji berries and other little 'add-ins'

These little things are a way of getting those SUPER FOODS into your meals without feeling like you are eating rabbit food and because they are so small, you wont even notice them.  When I've been having my morning porridge with my 3 year old, I'll add a tablespoon of chia seeds, flax seed and goji berries to my porridge and give it a good stir. I also add them to my smoothies (when its warm outside *insert guilty face*) to make them that bit more good for you. You can add flax seed and chia seeds to pretty much anything as they lack flavour, but are full of nutrients and other good stuffs. When you're lazy like me, just open up the packet, shake in some extras and its instantly a healthier meal!  I mean, if you're adding it to your KFC or Maccas, it probably doesn't count, but if you add it to sauce for your meat and veg, or into a lasagna, it just adds that little bit of extra goodness.

2. Buy wholemeal, low fat and salt reduced

Wholemeal, or wholegrain (if you like seeds) bread and pasta.  While I'm really trying to avoid carbs (I'm failing dismally), I've been making a point of only buying wholemeal bread/wraps so I feel less guilty about eating it.  This tip is really easy to get used too, you just buy your normal groceries, but where you can swap them for the healthier alternative, do it. You'll feel better about what you and your family are eating and when and if you plan on changing your eating habits a bit more dramatically like me, it wont feel like such an overwhelming task when you already have some healthy habits in place.

3. Buy your fruit and veg from a green grocer

Now, while this isn't necessarily something about your diet you can change, they way you shop and where you shop is also important and has an affect on the foods you eat.  I previously did all my shopping at Coles, which is totally fine, but since I went on maternity leave and have had the time (which I know is a challenging factor for those of you that work full-time) to go to the fruit and veg market/green grocer, it has had a huge impact on me financially and mentally. Firstly, 9 times out of 10, super markets are more expensive, so you'll save money if you make the effort to go to a green grocer.  Secondly, being in a setting that only has fresh produce, will make you want to buy more and inspire you to keep trying to be healthier.  There's no chocolate bars tempting you, no deep-fried crap calling your name, no distractions from what is important - HEALTHY FOOD.  The best tip I can give is to do the fruit and veg shop at a green grocer BEFORE you do the rest of your shop at your supermarket.  You'll be in the mindset of healthy eating and will find it easier walking past the tempting and delicious treat isles.

So, they are my top 3 tips on eating better! But I have one more bonus tip for those of you with children:

Seeing your children eat and enjoy a healthier diet, is the motivation you will need to keep on trying to better your eating lifestyle.  

As mums, we tend to put ourselves on the backburner and that's where my lack of motivation comes from, and why I haven't been taking good care of myself.  So even though I started this healthy eating journey purely because of vanity, I'm keeping it going because I love giving my son healthy food and makes me so proud to see him choosing cucumber over chocolate coated teddy biscuits!

I hope you found my tips and insight somewhat useful and helpful, please leave comments below of your healthy eating tips, because I'd love to incorporate some more into my life!

Ash x

'Twas a cold Melbourne night..

I'm settling in to write my first ever bloggity-blog post, when lo and behold my gorgeous 2 month old baby boy N decides he's going to wake from his slumber (of about 5 minutes) only to fall asleep as soon as I pick him up.  The game has begun.

It's taken me 5 minutes to write the 2 lines you just read. Typing one-handed, rocking him while strategically squishing him into my boob so his dummy doesn't fall out.

I think that pretty sums up motherhood - multitasking, someone needing you when you try to have some 'me time' (what's that again?!) and getting no personal space.  Not that I'm complaining though - I love being thrown up on, wee'd on and getting given little balls of rolled-up snot.

You can tell I have only boys, right?

But in all seriousness, being a mum is the best.  THE BEST. Nothing makes me happier than their smiling faces, laughter and being told "you a beautiful princess mummy".  Seeing my big 3-year-old boy O spell out his name, explain a new word he's learnt, tell me excitedly for the millionth time that Lightning McQueen won the race and what he did at 'school', makes all those sleepless nights and tears all worth it.

I could not be prouder of my children and myself for raising them into the sweet little men they are.  I find it hard to accept compliments, but when it comes to my kids, I'll happily accept!

Give your children (if you have them) an extra big squeeze when you check on them before going to sleep tonight.  Take an extra minute to look at their precious little faces and be proud of what you have achieved.

Ash x

Yes to Blueberries: A review

I'm going to preface this review by saying THESE PRODUCTS ARE AMAZING!!!!

But first, a bit of background info about my skin and other cleansers and exfoliants I've been using.  I have a sensitive, combination skin type: dry and sometimes flakey with an oily t-zone. In summer though, my whole face is like an oil slick - gross. I have scarring from acne and using the wrong products on my skin in the past. I also have a lot of redness on my cheeks, which appeared when I fell pregnant with my first son, and has never left - yippee. AND I get little bumps on my cheeks too, when that time of the month rears its ugly head.

For the last few months I've been using St Ives Apricot Scrub and it was working ok in the beginning, but my skin seemed to be getting rougher and really inconsistent texture and colour wise. The product itself is also really quite rough, which i never liked,but id heard such good reviews, i ignored how i felt about it - stupid. I was using Clean and Clear Morning Burst Facial Cleanser and that didn't seem to be doing a lot either - although it was really good at washing off my makeup, but not so much cleaning my skin.  Prior to that I was using a cleanser and an exfoliator from the Swisspers skincare range and although they started out great, once I fell pregnant with my second son, it felt like they were burning my skin, so I abruptly stopped using them.

So I decided I needed a change.I found the Yes To Cucumbers range in my local Priceline, a range I'd heard nothing but good things about and liked that they used real ingredients and not heaps of fillers. But then I noticed the Yes To Blueberries range - same company, just different fruits/vegetables for different skin needs - and it's for ageing skin, or they call it, Age Refresh.

These are the 2 products I have been using and LOVING! My skin has only ever felt and looked this good after fancy pants facials i've had at 
beauty salons.  I am honestly astounded! Maybe because I've been using the wrong products for so long,I'm not used to having this kind of skin!

Now, a little about each product straight from the Yes To website:

YES TO BLUEBERRIES Smoothing Daily Cleanser

"This gentle facial cleanser will make you say YES to a fresh face. A gentle start to your skincare regimen, this creamy cleanser is formulated with apple, which is rich in powerful anti-oxidants and natural alpha-hydroxy acids to help refresh and brighten skin; and lemon peel, a naturally derived cleanser to help sweep away dirt and grime and brighten the skin. Mmmm....clean. Soft. Nice. 

95% Natural

Petroleum, SLS, & Paraben Free

Cruelty-free"

The natural fragrance of blueberries and other delicious ingredients are calming, creamy and light on the skin and a 5c or 10c piece is enough to wash my face and neck.  It doesn't foam or lather up, which is good, because I find those products really drying and leave my face uncomfortably tight. I haven't used it to take off my makeup - I'm still using the Clean and Clear cleanser for that as its cheap and works well for that - so I don't know how well it works for that, but I imagine it would work well! My skin feels so clean, moisturised and refreshed after using this product! I love it!

RRP: $14.99 (from Priceline)

YES TO BLUEBERRIES SOFTENING FACIAL EXFOLIATOR

"Our Softening Facial Exfoliator is formulated with blueberries to fight the formation of free radicals, apple to help refresh and brighten the skin's surface, and corn-derived gentle exfoliating beads to gently slough off dead skin cells. Your skin will feel fresh, smooth and fabulous! Follow  with a layer of Yes To Blueberries Daily Repair Moisturizer and your skin will thank you...

                                                    

99% Natural

Petroleum, SLS, & Paraben Free

Cruelty-free"

 RRP: $14.99 (from Priceline) 

Second best exfoliator I have ever used! My favourite is from Bella Pierre and it's a gel consistency, so no scratchy bits, and you can literally see little balls of dead skin rubbing off (which sounds gross and painful, but it's really not) I don't use it anymore because it is waaayyyyy expensive.I digress.This exfoliator has little beads in amongst the creamy goodness, but they are not, I repeat NOT abrasive or rough on the skin, so I don't feel like I'm sand papering my face - it's actually quite nice.  I use the same 5-10c piece size and just like the cleanser, it doesn't foam or lather.  I'm left with my skin feeling smooth, revitalised, clean, moisturised and best of all, a smile on my face! I will 100% be repurchasing this product!

They have many other products in the Yes To Blueberries range, moisturisers, night creams, cleansing towelettes and so on.  Once my current moisturiser runs out (Bliss Steep Clean Mattifying Moisturizer, from the Oily Skincare range - I was lucky enough to get it extremely discounted - it was still $25, but it's amazing!) I will maybe try a moisturiser from this range, and perhaps an eye cream too - I have really dark purple colouring under my eyes and really thin, crepe-y skin.

The Yes To company have other ranges: 

YES TO CARROTS Beta-Carotene rich formulas, perfect for normal-to-dry skin.

YES TO CUCUMBERS Gentle, hypoallergenic formulas for normal or sensitive skin types 

YES TO TOMATOES Clinically-proven formulas for combination or acne-prone skin.

YES TO GRAPEFRUIT Correct and repair uneven skin tone for a brighter, more glowing complexion.

Here is the mission statement from their website:

YES TO MISSION

So next time you're in the market for a skin care range to try, or even just a product or two, I would highly recommend giving the Yes To brand a try!

Ash x

P.S. As always, all opinions are my own based on my experience and I am not affiliated with this company :)

The Lush Experience

I decided it would be a really good idea for me to finally try some goodies from Lush, and boy, am i glad I did! But before I jump right in, let me give you some background info.You see, when it's my sisters' or girlfriends' birthdays, I've been giving them vouchers for Lush so they can spoil and pamper themselves with delicious smelling face and body treats.  I am always tempted to grab myself a sneaky treat too, but never do.

And here's why:

Price: seems a little exorbitant (for my income bracket at least) I mean $32.95 for some body wash, that's crazy - can I get an AMEN?!     

The store layout: my local store feels like a vortex - once you step foot inside, you can't leave empty handed and I find that very intimidating. It's also really small, so getting my pram through it without knocking  any  of their carefully stacked towers of soap and bath bombs is difficult, and that's when the store is empty - which, lets  face it, is pretty much never! 

No real knowledge of Lush: despite watching video upon video on YouTube of hauls, but that there's something about it that makes the masses flock to it like seagulls to hot chips 

Staff:  knowledgeable and friendly - which to most is exactly what you want in sales staff, but to me, it's a lethal combination.  In the past, at various stores and life experiences, I've found myself talked into various products, clothes, drinks (urgh) and situations because the other  person was 'knowledgable' and 'friendly' and found myself thinking "why on earth did I let this colossal disaster happen?", because I'm a people pleaser, that's why!

So, this one day, it was a Tuesday around 9:30am, I felt that I'd been extra excellent at life lately and decided I was going to treat myself.  Having warmed up to Lush by my various visits to buy vouchers, I decide I'm ready to try to get myself something without leaving feeling like an idiot.

The girl that greets me is one who's sold me vouchers in the past, so I instantly feel relaxed! I tell her I'm after a particular product (which I'd seen on shaanxo's latest video) and she takes me straight to it, tells me about it and asks if I'd like to test it, so, I oblige. Now I don't know if she was hypnotising me, or if the delicious scent that was fogging my brain, but by the end of it, I wanted to buy one of everything on the store!She was so friendly and had been so attentive, without being overbearing, I strike up conversation about the type of products I'm after, so she shows me some more. Long story short, I leave with 3 products and never did I once feel pressured or embarrassed like I tend to normally do.

So, here's how I was wrong about Lush:

IT WAS ALL IN MY HEAD. Which I was aware of beforehand, but felt like there was an element of truth to it all. The store layout was a little bothersome, but I was the only customer in the store (hallelujah!), so it wasn't so bad! as I mentioned, the staff were friendly and knowledgeable, in the good way. To address the price point and what Lush is about, let me enlighten you:

This is direct from their website LINK www.lush.com.au:

THE 'WE BELIEVE'

We believe in making effective products from fresh* organic* fruit and vegetables, the finest essential oils and safe synthetics.

We believe in buying ingredients only from companies that do not commission test on animals and in testing our products on humans.

We invent our own products and fragrances; we make them fresh by hand using little or no preservative or packaging, using only vegetarian ingredients and we tell you when they were made.

We believe in happy people making happy soap, putting our faces on our products and making our mums proud.

We believe in long candlelit baths, sharing showers, massage, filling the world with perfume and in the right to make mistakes, lose everything and start again.We believe our products are good value, that we should make a profit and that the customer is always right.

*We also believe words like 'Fresh' and 'Organic' have an honest meaning beyond marketing.

If you head on over to their website www.lush.com.au and scroll to the bottom of the page, there is a heading that says Articles, and under that is links to info about their history, the charities they support,against animal testing, an ingredient finder, tips on living a 'greener' life, naked - which is about why the have simple packaging etc etc.Basically, they have a higher price margin because everything is organic,not tested on animals and handmade, which not what many other companies do. So even though I would never normally spend $30 on body wash, knowing the products are 'green', animal cruelty free, and not made of fillers, preservatives and fragrances, make it seem worth it.

So let me show you what I got!

Turkish Delight Smoothie

"Butter yourself up with our delightfully rosy body polish. Each pot is made with our new soap-base, packed with aphrodisiac jasmine and Turkish rose, smoothing almond oil, moisturising cocoa butter, and cheer-inducing neroli. Smooth it on in the shower for clean, soft and irresistibly fragrant skin. It’s the delight of everyone, not just the Turkish."

RRP: $32.95

Next I got a Mmm Melting Marshmallow Moment, Luxury Bath Melt

"Slow melting musky marshmallow marvel. MMM melts into a pink, fluffy waterbed of marshmallow and moisturizing cocoa butter. Each Melting Marshmallow Moment is made with marshmallow herb, which produces a sweet, skin-soothing mucilage that was used to make sugar candies for hundreds of years, and marigold, which is equally calming for your skin. Take your time, savour each moment and have as many marshmallows as you like."

RRP: $8.50

And last, but not least, Bubblegum Lip Scrub

"Our fabulous lip scrubs are here to keep your kissers sweet. This one will make your lips smell like our best-selling Snow Fairy shower gel. Bubblegum is made with exfoliating castor sugar and our delicious vegan flavour to gently scrub away rough skin, keeping your lips smooth and kissably soft. Simply rub it over your lips when they feel the need for some sugar".

RRP: $9.95

I have tried all 3 of the products, and I will be doing an in-depth review on all the products once I've been using them for a while, but I can tell you that so far, THEY'RE AMAZING! I am beyond happy that I took a chance on Lush and I will definitely be repurchasing from them time, and time again!  In fact, I am looking forward to going back again VERY soon - my body and my bathroom have never smelled to good!

Ash x

P.S. Lush also have a free magazine they give out when you make a purchase, called Lush Times.It's full of info about their products, behind the scenes, customer faves, makeup bag must haves, limited editions and new/upcoming products.

P.P.S. As always, all opinions are my own based on my experience and I am not affiliated with this company :)